whew.

Well, the day is at its end (Saturday just started). I ended up going for a 4 mile run at 330 which was really fun. I am finally rid of my shin splints. I also decided not to think about the Westy drama thing until I have to actually deal with it. After the run i went to my friend Christina's for a small party. We ate cookies and grapes and pizza and then played pingpong, guitar hero, and real guitar. After that we saw Eurotrip, a delightful familly comedy. I recomend it. Watch it with your parents. They'll love it. After that we just sat around and talked untill everybody started to leave. It was a fun noght which reminded me that I should get out more often. Also, on a very exciting note, my hair is almost ponytailable. I'd give it another month or so. My parents are taking the next two days off from work. I think they're going to make me drive tomorrow. So pray. Pray for my soul as well as any other poor soul that may be within a 2 mile radius of the road while I drive our shitmobile through the herds of CT ferraries and lexuses. Happy new years everyone.

my grandma spelled my name wrong on christmass. Twice. lol. But not really.



New topic, same post. Yes. High five!

So for this Christmass I decided to try a little expiriment. I asked my family not to give me any presents. As a Buddhist, I believe both that every day is a holiday, and that material things comprimise our ability to live in the present moment. They respected my wishes and so on Christmass day everyone was openning presents exept me. And I gotta tell you, it really wasn't that bad. It's hard to explain, especially through writing, but I felt kind of freer. I don't have to worry about any more stuff, and I find that once you let go of something such as a hope or a fear or in this case the desire for cool sh*t, you wonder why you were even clinging to it in the first place. In this society of course, we are taught that hope is good, but I disagree. It is like the saying goes, "Hope is not the opposite of despair but rather its source." No one just starts out with a pessimistic outlook. They start out with hopes like let's say, getting into Yale. Someone is trying to get into Yale. Every day, they think of how great going to Yale would be. They cling to the philosophy that they can only be happy to go to Yale. It makes them happy to have that hope. But then they apply and are rejected. Suddenly without that hope, they cling to despair. They still think that the only way to be happy is by going to Yale even thought they know that they can't go there. Despair is born only of hope. But there is an optimistic way of seeing this. You can be happy if you let go of hope and ideals. Doing this completely is to attain enlightenment, and is pretty hard, but even letting go of a few hopes like good grades or excellence in sports, the hopes that are more easilly noticed, can make you feel alot better. It gets harder when you get into the, "I hope my family doesn't die soon" and realated ideals territory. Those are harder to let go of. But just start by letting go of the small stuff. It really works, trust me. And by let go I don't mean switch extremes; just let go. If you consider yourself a liberal, don't just become conservative, just stop creating that illusion of yourself. Don't be a "moderate" either, just be. If you step out of your self-percieved illusions, It is easier for you to see things how they really are. It's hard to do, but try it. Illusions seem comfortable, but they are just philosophical restraints. Another quote I think is in order.
"To often we enjoy the comfort of opinion without the discomfort of thought."

Happy New Years Eve, everyone.
this is Anne, signing off.